Date 3: Taking the Leap

Thursday April 4, 2024

one year, two months and fourteen days ago - i arrived at formosa cafe on santa monica boulevard in hollywood for my first date with mike. it wasn't our first meeting; that had taken place in September 2008, when he joined the university residential student community as a building chairman while i was an executive board member, running shit. our second meeting had happened fifteen years later when, on january seventh or so in 2023, mike and i matched on Hinge. "Mike C." his profile said. I knew his last name - it was on the tip of my brain! but mostly, I knew that he was mike from URSC. mike from a cappella. mike from the "voCals."

i walked into the restaurant and told the hostess that i was meeting someone; she said that he hadn't arrived yet so i snuck straight through to the powder room in the back. i touched up my chapstick; peed and checked my hair. i had wanted to look nice but also not like i had tried too hard, so i was wearing my favorite "go to" date dress, a short number with cap sleeves and a criss-crossed blouse in the front that showed my neckline but also left something to the imagination. i had on gold hoops to match my sydney opera house necklace - which mike would go on to notice and then mention the next day.

finally, i wore my black steve madden boots - for both height and confidence. i didn't remember how tall mike would be, but i did remember that he was warm and earnest. not too cool to go to the annual pacurh conference with the rest of ursc's finest nerds. i also knew from his steady stream of 2023 voice memos that he was keenly curious about me, prone to making up songs and singing / dancing around his flat, and single despite our decade each of dating since wrapping at usc.

my favorite things about mike that night would end up being my favorite things about him today. he spoke with love and admiration of his mother, sister(s) and the powerful women role models he had grown up around. he thought that it was so cool that i had lived in Australia (so cool!!) and the island country-continent was at the top of his travel bucket list. he told me not only that he loved learning new things, but that he was always keen to learn other people's views on things in order to best understand the full 360-degree perspective on a matter. finally, i loved that he rolled with the punches (and checked the menu in advance for mocktails!) when i told him that i wasn't drinking [during dry January], then told the server that this was because we were expecting our first baby together [just to mess with him].

after hours of talking, not ordering and barely pausing the breathe, i took the leap. i looked over at adjacent mike in our corner-booth and asked him:

well, are you going to kiss me before the food comes?

the rest was history. he never broke eye contact but paused with a coy smile and then leaned in to assuredly rise to my challenge. the rest of the night, we barely stopped touching. i placed my hand next to his thigh while talking and he insisted that it was fine if i kept it there. he continued to look at me throughout the night, smiled at all of my stories and also my answers. he asked me if i wanted to have children one day and i told him that only recently i had realized i definitely do. he seemed pleased by that, but all i remember noticing that night was the way he talked about his nephew, and talked about going to Maccu Piccu or Egypt or out on the road for Warped Tour.

i didn't know that he might go on to become my hopeful, future baby Daddy. i couldn't have guessed that i had potentially just gone on my last first date.

jump to tonight, April 4th 2024. one year, two months and fourteen days later, mike is asleep on the couch while we watch ted lasso - well, i watch and mike snoozes to the comforting sound of coach ted's voice. we had ramen and shared a sushi roll for dinner, after an amazing afternoon romp and a productive workday in our separate wings of the shared office. one month from today, we'll move in together and BOTH begin cohabitating with each other's true love for the first time, respectively! we're both nervous but excited and also open about both feelings. i couldn't be more sure that this is right.
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thanks, formosa cafe. thanks to you, we're still taking the leap to this day.